How often should I forgive?

Truly, I say to you, whatever you bind on earth shall be bound in heaven, and whatever you loose on earth shall be loosed in heaven. Again I say to you, if two of you agree on earth about anything they ask, it will be done for them by my Father in heaven. For where two or three are gathered in my name, there am I among them." Then Peter came up and said to him, "Lord, how often will my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? As many as seven times?" Jesus said to him, "I do not say to you seven times, but seventy-seven times. "Therefore the kingdom of heaven may be compared to a king who wished to settle accounts with his servants. When he began to settle, one was brought to him who owed him ten thousand talents. And since he could not pay, his master ordered him to be sold, with his wife and children and all that he had, and payment to be made. So the servant fell on his knees, imploring him, 'Have patience with me, and I will pay you everything.' And out of pity for him, the master of that servant released him and forgave him the debt. But when that same servant went out, he found one of his fellow servants who owed him a hundred denarii, and seizing him, he began to choke him, saying, 'Pay what you owe.' So his fellow servant fell down and pleaded with him, 'Have patience with me, and I will pay you.' He refused and went and put him in prison until he should pay the debt. When his fellow servants saw what had taken place, they were greatly distressed, and they went and reported to their master all that had taken place. Then his master summoned him and said to him, 'You wicked servant! I forgave you all that debt because you pleaded with me. And should not you have had mercy on your fellow servant, as I had mercy on you?' And in anger his master delivered him to the jailers, until he should pay all his debt. So also my heavenly Father will do to every one of you, if you do not forgive your brother from your heart." (Mat 18:18-35)

We begin this Gospel with Peter’s attempt at magnanimity. "Lord, how often will my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? As many as seven times?" The rabbis of the day would say that forgiving three times would be more than adequate, so Peter is doubling that, and adding one. What a nice guy! But, here we see the difference between God’s forgiveness and ours, as Jesus replies, "I do not say to you seven times, but seventy-seven times.” He takes Peters number, then multiplies it ten-times and then times itself again. 

So, does this mean that we are to keep an account of the sins committed against us, and at 490 we get to cease forgiving? Well, Jesus explains that the answer is a resounding “no” in the parable that follows. This parable illustrates that we are to offer the same level of forgiveness to our brothers and sisters that we would like to, and actually do, receive from our eternal Father in Heaven.

The first debtor in this parable owes 10,000 talents. A talent was roughly 6000 denarii, or days’ wages. At the current minimum wage of $8.25/hour, assuming an 8-hour work day, one denarii would be $66, so one talent would be $396,000. This guy owes 10,000 talents, or $3.96 billion in today’s economy. That’s 60 million day’s wages! Of course Jesus point is that this guy was not going to be able to repay his debt in his lifetime, or that of his children and grandchildren, unless one of them was Bill Gates!

He begs the king to give him a chance and not sell him and his family into slavery, and the king forgives the debt. This is an act of extreme generosity by the king. So, how does this guy receive this act of generosity?

He comes across someone who owes him 100 denarii ($6600) a significant, but not unrepayable amount, given time and a favorable interest rate. Rather than remembering the huge debt that he had just been forgiving, and extending the same forgiveness to his brother, the guy roughs his debtor up and has him thrown in debtors’ prison.

We need to understand who we are in this story.

As debtors, in God’s economy, we are all the first guy. We have committed sins the penalty for which we can never pay. Yet, we have been forgiven. God paid our debt with the blood of His only Son, Jesus Christ. This is the definition of grace – undeserved favor. We can never do anything to earn this grace, we can only attempt to live into the sacrifice that has been made for us once and for all on the cross at Calvary.

Toward the end of the movie “Saving Private Ryan”, Tom Hanks’ character, as he is dying, tells Private Ryan, played by Matt Damon, to “earn this”. As the story goes, Ryan had three brothers. Two of them were killed during the invasion of Normandy on D-day, and the third died in the Pacific Theater. Hanks was given orders to take his company, find Private Ryan and get him out of the war so that this mother would not lose all four of her sons in the war.

The mission cost the lives of most of Hank’s company, including his own – a sacrifice that Ryan could never repay. But, he is given the charge to “earn this”. At the end of the film, an elder Ryan stands before a white tombstone at the Normandy cemetery and asks his wife, “am I a good man?” The question intended to answer the question, “Have I earned the sacrifice made on my behalf all those years ago?” She tells him that he is a good man, but we really don’t know for sure what kind of a life he has led. We assume that he has lived a life where few days have gone by where he did not hear echoing in his ears those two words, “Earn this”.

That is the point that is lost on the first debtor in Jesus’ parable. He just assumes that he deserved to be forgiven his debt, and gets on with his life as if nothing has changed. He goes out looking for ways to get ahead, without regard for the grace that has been given to him. He doesn’t even try to earn it.

Those of us who have been washed in the Blood of the Lamb must never forget, or take for granted, the gift that has been given to us. We have been spared the consequences of our own actions that got us into a terrible mess. In exchange for eternal damnation, we have been given eternal life in Heaven. We need to live our lives in an attempt to “Earn this”.

How do we do this? First, we are expected to be as forgiving toward others as God has been to us. The Lord’s Prayer says, “Forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us,” or “Forgive us our debts as we forgive our debtors.” While we are not God, and will never be perfect in our dealings with other, we must be constantly evaluating our actions according to this standard: are we forgiving as we wish to be forgiven?

We are to be vessels of the grace that God has given us. This should be the characteristic that draws others to Christ through his people. We are to act differently toward those who have wronged us. If we do this, no matter how imperfectly, others will be drawn to Jesus through us. If we refuse to work toward forgiving others as we have been forgiven, we are failing to earn the grace that has been given to us, and that will have eternal consequences.

Let us be a people who are constantly seeking to earn the free gift that has been given to us through Jesus Christ. By doing so, we will also be fulfilling His commission to bring others to him.